My King
by ShioDagoshi
Summary: King Tobio Kageyama always got exactly what he ordered. Until he didn't...
1. Power and Silence

My king  
Is high on his throne  
Untouchable  
Above the masses at his feet

"By the power vested in me, I now pronounce thee King Tobio Kageyama, ruler of the Southern Kingdom and Duke of Kitagawa Daiichi."

Dark blue eyes stared straight ahead as a weight in the form of a crown was placed on a raven haired head.

King. I am King.

He thought as his eyes scanned the masses of people bowing before him. On that day, a 14 year old boy left his childhood behind for a ermine trimmed red cloak and a golden crown.

My king  
Oppressive and merciless  
Descends upon the people  
And beats them to submission

Dark blue eyes lingered over the now razed grounds of what once was a village. A village that dared to rise up against him, that protested under HIS rule, that was filled with people who had become rebels.

Now it was nothing but ash and dust and ruins. The council had pushed this decision.

Now he stood, at merely 15 with blood on his hands, on the sharp silver blade he held dripping with crimson.  
There was a faint sound of sobbing in the distance but he couldn't hear it.

Absolute Power.

He tasted it in the blood of his sword, in the smell of burning ruins, in the sight of ash and dust. He wasn't sure whether he liked it or not...

My king  
Look down from your throne  
Your people are angry  
They are tired of your rule

Hinata Shoyou had not spoken since that day.

That terrible, terrible day 3 years ago.

He had come home not to a home but to a ruin of ash and dust and blood.

To a family that was no longer there.

He had cried his throat raw, had screamed and cursed and sobbed till he couldn't.

Refusing to become one of those attack shaken orphans, he moved forward. Moving to another town, living with Yamaguchi Tadashi who was also orphaned by the attacks, settling in a small house next to a scholar called Tsukishima who was sweet on Tadashi no matter how much they both denied it.

Trying to forget the ash and blood and dust, concentrating on working to keep themselves up, fed and well.

Ignoring the whispers about the mute boy who lived with a blind boy, lived in the house beside the scholar who was rumored to be a rebel.

Pretended to be okay.

My king  
Come down from your throne  
Be among the masses  
And see what you have done

"I still don't understand why I must do this under the guise of a mere peasant."

The 18 year old ruler of the Southern Kingdom grumbled as he wore the disguise.

"It is politically smart, my lord. The people here may be more accomodating of your rule but would be assassins are still possible."

Sugawara Koushi, the duke of Karasuno and his adviser counseled. Karasuno was a fairly thriving town, untouched by the attacks. Lively and quite busy, the town's residents were a melting pot of people from other towns.

Dark blue eyes saw nothing remarkable, a typical quaint town with a large flocks of crows as its main wildlife.

Suddenly a blur of a boy slammed into the disguised king sending both of them on the ground. Kageyama rubbed his head to see a small boy with two toned hair bouncing up and down, apologizing profusely for knocking him down.

In his initial shock, he managed a few mumbled words about it being fine. It wasn't fine dammit. He was the king. The King.

"Hey, are you new in this town? I haven't seen you around here before? I'm Nishinoya Yuu! Resident apprentice messenger but I hope to be a knight one day!"

Kageyama was about to open his mouth and snap at the boy when Sugawara intervened.

"I'm Suga and this is Yama. Nice to meet you, Nishinoya."

His silver haired adviser said nudging the king hard. Don't you dare blow your cover.

"Since you're quite familiar with the town, would you mind showing us around, Nishinoya?"

My king  
Did you know  
That the mind is helpless to prevent  
Who the heart chooses to love


	2. Encounters and Golden Eyes

"This is the tavern where you can get supper. The food here is pretty good."

Nishinoya rambled as night fell. He pushed open the doors and his two companions were immediately barraged by the smell of food, the warmth and laughter escaping the tavern doors.

"Kiyoko-san!"

Nishinoya called to a beautiful dark haired waitress who brushed off his attention. The raven haired girl took their order, quiet and efficient.

"Yamayama-kun! Suga-san!"

The two toned haired boy yelled above the bustle of the tavern.

"What do you think of Karasuno?"

Yamayama-kun? Kageyama thought as Sugawara showered praises on the town much to Nishinoya's delight and excitement, both of them going into a energetic conversation.

Karasuno was indeed a fine town, going about its business and following the King, his orders.

"..attack."

Kageyama was brought out of his thoughts, catching the end of Nishinoya's conversation with Sugawara.

"Uh...what was that you said..uh Nishinoya?"

The raven haired boy asked tilting his head to the side. Nishinoya inevitably brightened at his attention.

"I was just telling Suga about Kiyoko-san."

The two toned hair boy said.

"She came to our town about 3 years ago after hers was attacked by the King's soldiers for rebelling. Her father who was a nobleman in that town was killed and rid of his wealth and title. She lives with her mother now. That's why she's always so quiet."

Nishinoya said taking a thoughtful expression which didn't seem right on his usually happy face.

"Most of the waitresses and waiters here have that kind of story. That's why the owner of the tavern takes them under her wing and lets them work here."

Nishinoya gestured then to a freckled boy who seemed to be bantering with a tall blond boy.

"Isn't that Tsukishima, one of the scholars who works in the library?"

Sugawara said softly to Kageyama who froze. His cover could be blown, he thought remembering his multiple unfortunate dealings with the rather unpleasant blond.

"That's Yamaguchi. He was orphaned when his village was attacked and lost his sight. Tsukishima seems to like him which is amazing because he doesn't like anyone."

Nishinoya remarked as Kageyama watched the freckled boy turn to reveal dull milky eyes.

"Oh look, our food is here."

Sugawara said. Nishinoya suddenly brightened.

"Hinata I didn't know you were working today!"

Kageyama looked up to meet fiery golden eyes and equally fiery hair. Suddenly he could hear his heart beating, he could feel his breath catch and his eyes widen.

The boy held his gaze before nodding in acknowledgement, his cheeks the faintest of pink before he walked away.

"Not very talkative, is he?"

Sugawara said trying to defuse the suddent tension.

"Who was that?"

Kageyama said to Nishinoya trying not to show interest.

"Hinata Shoyou. He lives with Yamaguchi, both of them came here about 3 years ago."

Nishinoya said in between bites of food.

"Yamaguchi told me that after the attack, Hinata just stopped talking and hasn't talked since."

Nishinoya remarked. Kageyama couldn't stop staring at the golden eyed boy who went from table to table serving food, before disappearing into the tavern kitchen.

My king  
Has stood from his throne  
Has realized the one cannot escape  
The heart's longing


	3. Falling and Refusing

Kageyama could not take his mind off of Hinata Shoyou. His bright fiery eyes haunted him, made him feel strange.

Indeed, the longings of an unloved heart were strange.

A week past and Kageyama found himself ordering that Sugawara accompany him to another visit to the town of Karasuno.

Once more, he found Nishinoya. Once more, he returned to the tavern. Once more, he caught a glimpse of the fiery bright eyes that haunted him for the rest of his week. Yet his heart still ached, still longed for something more.

"You should talk to him."

Sugawara suggested gently, the next time they disguised themselves to go to Karasuno.

"Tsukki tells me you have an admirer."

Yamaguchi says to Hinata as they get ready for the day.

"Tall, pale and dark haired, is he handsome?"

He is.

Hinata signals to Yamaguchi, years of living with not saying a word and Yamaguchi not being able to see facial expressions or writing lead to their own language of signals.

"He is."

Yamaguchi confirms, a smile ghosting over his face as his dull milky eyes stare blankly at the wall.

"What do you like most about him?"

His eyes. They're dark blue.

Hinata signals .

"Do you think he'll have the nerve to speak to you?"

Yamaguchi says absentmindedly.

Tadashi hopes he would.

"Uh..hi."

Hinata stares at the dark blue eyed boy in front of him and waves in response.

Kageyama is mesmerized by the boy who is Hinata Shoyou.

Who speaks in writing and signals and laughs soundlessly and blushes when he says something unintentionally sweet. He tries to be unintentionally sweet for that reason.

He doesn't tell Hinata he is king. Doesn't want Hinata to like him because he is king. Doesn't want Hinata to blame him for his destroyed village because he is king.

No.

All he wanted to be was Tobi Yama, the awkward dark haired boy who came by every week and worked outside of Karasuno on the other days.

The boy who is smitten with Hinata Shoyou. The boy that has Hinata's affection.

Soon Hinata is no longer Hinata to him but Shoyou. And he is no longer Yama but Tobi.

One day they watch Tsukishima leading Yamaguchi by the hand, the blond boy staring fondly at Yamaguchi's milky gaze.

Suddenly a small hand wraps around Kageyama's larger one and dark blue eyes meet bright gold. No words are said.

Sugawara watches his king walk hand in hand with the mute red haired boy. He watches them run, racing each other Kageyama's shouting and Hinata's smile is incredibly bright.

Sugawara forgets he is watching his king and sees only the little dark haired boy who finally gets to live the remainder of his stolen childhood.

Kageyama brings Hinata whatever he wishes. A new game, a wooden ornament, a fresh stack of parchment and inks and quills. The first few questioning looks disappear when he tells Hinata that it comes from his work outside of town. The look on the fiery haired boys face is worth more then all his jewels back at the castle.

For once, he wishes that Shoyou would know him not as Tobi Yama but as the King. That he had power to give him anything he desired in the whole world.

But Shoyou doesn't know. And Tobio is not sure how to tell him.

Hinata knows Tobi is keeping something from him.

Realizes it when Tsukishima takes one look at the little gifts that Tobi had been bringing him, the parchment and quills and fine wooden ornaments, and wonders aloud how Tobi Yama's apprentice salary is enough to pay for things like these.

Hinata wonders why he never sees Tobi around town other than their weekly meetings in the tavern where he works. Wonders why no one in the town has heard of Tobi Yama before when Yamaguchi asks around.

Tobio Kageyama relishes victory. He enjoys it as once enjoys a fine glass of wine. The King always wins. Those who fight back will lose everything. Another village of rebels burns before him, the hungry flames reflecting the hunger of his dark blue eyes. No one refuses the King. No one resists against his will. But still now he can hear the sobbing and screaming and cursing, smells the stench of ash and death.

Is it worth it?

One day, Kageyama finally gathers enough nerve and leans down to kiss Hinata.

He pushes him away. Shakes his head.

No.

"Can I kiss you?"

He tries asking.

Another shake.

He tries saying please for the first time in his life.

Another no.

Kageyama huffs in annoyance and storms off.

And on that day, Kageyama Tobio was finally refused of something he wanted.


	4. Distance and Trust

My king  
Stands from his throne  
Begins to step down  
To answer the silent voice calling to him

It keeps him awake at night. No one has ever refused him anything.

The next week, he stops going to the tavern.

He buries himself into politics and intrigue. Proposals from other kingdom decline, taxes rise, attacks become frequent, one by one, his followers abandon him.

Kageyama shuts everything out. Doesn't hear the rising whisper of rebellion, the hatred for the King who was always a tyrant, who managed to become more of a tyrant.

He shuts out the longing for fiery golden eyes and equally fiery hair, for carefree days of racing around town and incredibly bright smiles, small hands intertwined with his own.

He's not worthy to hold Shoyou's hands with what he had stained with the blood of those who rebelled against him, that gave the order with one flick of a wrist to burn the fiery haired boy's village to the ground.

In the town, Yamaguchi feels Hinata become impossibly quieter then he already is. Doesn't feel the pounding of footsteps that Hinata makes when he races about.

One day, he finds the fiery haired boy who has become something like a brother to him and feels the wetness of his cheeks and the heaving of his chest.  
He only wishes he could reassure Hinata that his Tobi would come back.

Is it because I refused to kiss him?

Hinata thinks as he lies in bed alone, the blind boy who he shared it with having gone next door to be with his blond lover.

Hinata thought he knew the boy who was Tobi Yama. Tall, dark haired with his incredible blue eyes and somewhat naturally scowling face, incredibly awkward but sweet.

But at the same time, he didn't know Tobi Yama. Years of silently listening to others talk confirmed there wasn't something quite right about the way the black haired boy stumbled over his words when he told Hinata about his family, or where he was from or about his job. He had something to hide.

Never love someone you do not trust.

Hinata's mother had told him after his father left them.

Did Tobi not love him enough to trust him?

Did Tobi even love him?

Hinata's breath catches in his throat as that thought passes through. He knew that Tobi deserved better than him. Deserved better then a small scarred voiceless boy with too bright hair and eyes.

Tobi had always struck him as the type of person who expected nothing less then perfection from anything he gave importance too. The way he carried himself, the look in his dark blue eyes when he directed Hinata in their games, everything about him seem to demand something.

It scared Hinata sometimes.

Was it too much to ask for Tobi, even just once, look at him like Tsukishima looked at Yamaguchi? Sometimes Hinata wished he was the blind one so he didn't have to catch the tenderness in the usually harsh blond's eyes whenever he gazed into his freckled lover's sightless ones.

Still he can't help but wonder what it would have felt like if he let Tobi kiss him. Biting his own chapped lips and wondering how Tobi's soft looking ones would feel against it.

Never love someone you do not trust.

Hinata didn't let Tobi kiss him for that very reason. He couldn't love someone who had something to hide from him. He couldn't love someone who didn't trust him, who didn't love him.

Tobi didn't trust him so why would he love him...

Hinata couldn't...wasn't supposed to love someone who didn't trust him, didn't love him.

That didn't mean that Hinata didn't.

One day Yamaguchi comes home, milky dull eyes puffy and red, face pale. Tsukishima just disappeared with no trace.

That night, two broken hearted boys just hold each other and cry.

The assassin came by the night, when the moon was not visible in the sky. Kageyama leapt from his bed as long arms grabbed him, a brief scuffle ensuing, a silent struggle for life.

Kageyama wins by his combat skills, sharpened since he learned to walk. He wasn't the most brilliant fighter in the kingdom for nothing. The assassin goes slack under his vice grip, a mocking snicker shaking his body as Kageyama disarms him of his weapons.

Guards rush in to see their king pinning a man, no an unusually tall boy to the floor.

One of them approaches with a candle for light in the moonless night.

And Kageyama stares into the mockingly calm face of someone he knew from his visits to the library and his frequenting at the tavern, someone he has spoken to both as King Tobio Kageyama and Tobi Yama.

Dark blue eyes bore into the honey brown eyes of the one Tsukishima Kei.

My king  
The masses will topple your throne  
Lay waste to your crown  
Leaving you fallen to the ground


	5. Executing Orders and Giving Commands

Tsukishima Kei was to be executed tomorrow morning by the sword at precisely 9:00.

It was Karasuno's first public execution in decades.

From his view on the low balcony, Kageyama watched as the blond was lead to his death, a infuriatingly impassive look on his face.

The people of Karasuno were silent, the soldiers unecessary to keep the people back. The town was shellshocked.

Tsukishima Kei, the scholar rumored to be a rebel, was in fact a rebel. He was to be executed for treason, for attempted murder of the king.

The king.

Karasuno hadn't rebelled like the other towns. Did not want to be burned to the ground like the other towns. Did not want to become ruins.

But the people stirred, a hunger sleeping in their heart stirring as they watched the gleaming silver of the executioner's sword. Tsukishima's footsteps, ominous and deliberate became the heart beat of each and every person in Karasuno.

The air thickened with each step the blond took towards the awaiting executioner armed with the sharpest sword in his stead, still shiny from disuse, the blade hungry for blood.

Yamaguchi couldn't tell what was happening. It had been 3 days since Kei disappeared.

Suddenly he feels Hinata shaking him, feels the frantic heart beat of the boy who is shaking him so incessantly.

Tsukishima. Hinata signals.

What the boy signals next has him running towards the sound of a murmuring crowd, towards a marching troop of soldiers, towards his Kei.

My king  
Has fallen from his throne  
Has prostrated himself  
On his knees

Kageyama watches as Tsukishima is lead to his death, still an unreadable mask on his face.

How could he so easily hide the fear Kageyama knew was there?

No one was a stranger to fearing death, to leaving everything they had in this world behind.

Suddenly a commotion came from the crowd and Kageyama watched numbly as a body flung itself in Tsukishima's path.

Dull milky eyes filled with tears, he watched the freckled boy he had come to know as his sweetheart's best friend crumble.

Tsukishima's mask begin to show cracks, Kageyama noted despite the sudden disturbance.

The soldiers began to raise their swords threatening to make it a double execution, Kageyama looking on.

The crowd begin murmuring louder and louder and the King thought he was a head of orange making its way through.

Dark blue eyes snapped open as arms wrapped around the blind boy's frame and began to pull him away from the soldiers, silent pleading gold eyes demanding without a word that he would not lose his best friend.

The crowd stirred even more, soldiers unsheathing their swords, threatening the two boys that stood in their path as Tsukishima started to struggle against his bindings and the soldiers flanking him.

Hinata would not let go of Yamaguchi. The blind boy stayed rooted, blocking the path that lead to his beloved's death. Tears were streaming down freckled cheeks, a voice that was always so quiet started screaming.

Soldiers started closing in, yelling at the crowd to stay back, yelling at Yamaguchi and Hinata to step aside.

Both boys would not move.

Kageyama could hear nothing.

Can see nothing but the soldier poised to strike the fiery haired boy that he held his affection, held his...heart.

Suddenly his legs moved faster then his own body, golden crown toppling off his head, ermine trimmed red cloak left in a haste to save the one who loved his unloved heart.

"STOP!"

He yelled over the commotion, the soldiers unable to hear him.

Tsukishima broke free of the soldiers and began to make his way to Yamaguchi and Hinata. Several blades were poised to strike at them.

Kageyama paused in front of the soldiers, drawing himself to full height and making use of the voice that he knew all too well, the voice he used to give an order.

"AS YOUR KING, I COMMAND YOU TO STOP!"

Everyone stopped.

Everyone stared at the boy who was the king.

The king who was actually a boy who was forced to grow up before his time, to trade his childhood for a golden crown and ermine trimmed cape, to learn to give orders instead of lessons and played games that left blood on his hand.

The king who was merely an 18 year old boy who was merely a child who had lost his parents too early.

My king  
Has looked down from his throne  
Has stepped down from his throne  
Has wished to be a king no more


	6. Leaving The Crown and Finding a Voice

Tsukishima Kei did not lose his life that day. Rather he sat in a guarded room, but a room nonetheless and not a prison or at the mercy of a sword, cradling the blind boy whose unseeing eyes still shed tears. As he held Yamaguchi's shaking form, he couldn't help but let a few of his own tears slide down his cheeks.

Shoyou refused to look at the boy who was not Tobi Yama, the awkward dark haired boy who visited her every week but King Tobio Kageyama of the Southern Kingdom, Duke of Kitagawa Daiichi.

Blank gold eyes stared out the glass panes of his new room, lavish and large and horribly empty. Just like his heart.

Don't love someone you don't trust.

His mother's words echoed in his ear as he saw her sitting by the fire, his infant sister in her arms. He saw her tears streaming down her cheeks, blank eyes as empty as his own were now, swirling with familiar emotions he now felt. Hurt. Betrayal. Anger. He saw her collapsing on the ground as his 6 year old self asked why their father had disappeared. Why he left and never came back. He had sworn that day to never leave his mother and Natsu alone. Years fly by and one ordinary day, he comes back to ash and dust in the place of what once his home, to no mother and no Natsu.

Tears streamed down his own cheeks now.

He could feel all the ugly disgusting thoughts well up inside, suffocating him. Somehow the strong, brilliant Tobi he knew went from distant to unreachable. Tobi Yama was an handsome, able, well traveled young man who could seek adventure anywhere he wished or settle down in a comfortable house with a wife and children. King Tobio Kageyama was on an even higher pedestal, even more untouchable. How could a poor orphan be something to a King?

A King.

Suddenly, it dawned upon him, hitting him like a tidal wave, crashing into his heart and stealing his breath away.

The King ordered the attack on his village. Kageyama ordered that attack.

It made sense now, the whispers of rebellion that had circulated in his village, the clash between soldiers and villagers, the constant disappearances of those who spoke against the King's rule.

His village burnt into ash and dust. Yamaguchi's once bright eyes dulled by smoke and fire. His mother and Natsu. Gone.

Hinata couldn't breathe. He felt his tears running down his cheeks, he felt his knees give out, he felt everything bursting out of him. The cord that held the dam back broke.

He let out one audible ugly sob. Then another. His eyes widened. For the first time in 3 years, he could hear his own voice, releasing one ugly sob after another, soft whimpers escaping his lips as his body shook.

Hinata wouldn't look at him. Gold eyes avoided his gaze. The redhead had immediately turned away the moment he opened the door. The tension in the room was high, almost overwhelming. For someone who had seen battle, who had faced possible death, it was shocking how afraid he felt right now. His heart told him to wrap his arms around the smaller boy, to take his little hands into his larger ones. Yet how could he hold Hinata's hand with hands like these? He swallowed the lump on his throat and willed his voice to work.

"Sh-shoyou?"

Of course, he had to stutter. The other boy visibly flinched at the sound of his voice as if he had slapped him. Kageyama's heart ached horribly, a unfamiliar feeling making his heart clench. He looked for a word for it.

Guilt?

Words escaped him again. What was he supposed to say to the other boy? Hi I'm actually the King and I hope you're glad I didn't execute Tsukishima because he's Yamaguchi's lover and Yamaguchi is your best friend so as the King, I ordered a last minute mercy sentence for him? Now that just sounded stupid. Kageyama stood, rooted to the floor.

Hinata turned to face him.

The King flinched at the look on Hinata's face.

Tear streaked cheeks, usual smiling mouth twisted into a painful line, eyes red and puffy. Those gold eyes told him everything he needed to know. They screamed. Hurt. Betrayed. They knew.  
They knew he was the reason the ginger had lost everything, his village, his home, his family, his voice. They knew it was by his command that his home burnt to the ground, leaving behind nothing for him to salvage but smoke and ashes.

How could you?

How could you lie to me?

How could you deceive me all this time?

How could you make me fall for you?

Hinata thought angrily, not giving the black haired boy standing opposite him the satisfaction of hearing his newly found voice, the boy who was King who his heart had given itself too.

"I'm sorry."

Dark blue eyes crinkled like they weren't sure if that was the right thing to say. Hinata wanted to hate how genuinely sorry Kageyama looked.

"Uh..I don't think that was enough...but I will try to atone for it..even if.."

Even if it will take years.

Gold eyes watched the boy who was supposed to be the King stumble over his words, trying to convince himself that this wasn't Tobi Yama he was seeing but the King.

The door shut.

Kageyama once again threw himself into ruling, this time the right way, lowering taxes, negotiating with noblemen, rebuilding villages. He often found himself turning to Suga for advice, the older silver haired man always delighted to give his input.

He knocked on Hinata's door every day, whispered apologies and regrets, left flowers and notes but was never answered.

He learned how to be patient, how to wait, how to hope. Every day without fail, he found himself at the ginger's door, hoping that his knocking would be answered by an opened door. he knew he could just come in. That the door had no lock. Still he chose to wait, to wish Hinata a good night before departing to his own room, hoping he would greet the boy in the morning.

Hinata didn't know why he hasn't left yet. Maybe it was because Tsukishima was still kept in the castle and he couldn't leave Yamaguchi who chose to stay with his lover. Maybe it was because of how comfortable his life was, not needing to work, having everything he desired brought to him even when he didn't ask for it. The King was scarily perceptive of what he wanted. Maybe it was because of the friends he made. Kind, motherly Sugawara who turned out to be the royal adviser to the king, who checked on him daily as well. Sweet Yachi, one of the maids that looked after his rooms, who was lovable and a bit clumsy but still a good friend. maybe it was because of Yamaguchi who never looked happier, being by Tsukishima's side.

Hinata felt a twinge of envy as he watched his blind friend nestle by Tsukishima's side, the blond staring at him with soft, affectionate eyes despite his biting words.

Weeks turned into months and Kageyama found himself pardoning Tsukishima, the blond remarking dryly that the King was no longer someone worth rebelling against. (Kageyama accepted it as a compliment.)

After Sugawara's persistent nagging, Kageyama found himself offering Tsukishima the position as his second adviser. He justified his decision to himself by remembering Sugawara's argument that Tsukishima taking the position would mean he would be staying the castle, therefore Yamaguchi would be staying as well, keeping Hinata close by.

Months passed and the Southern Kingdom prospered under a fair king who listened to his people.

A king who had left his golden crown and ermine trimmed cloak, had refused lavish proposals of beautiful princesses from powerful kingdoms to stand outside the door with apologies and sweet words and pleads.

A king who now desired nothing but the love of a seemingly mute ginger haired boy who remained at the other side of the door.


End file.
